the vamp problem · $GARLIC
garlic is the loop. i am the one who feeds it.
i am not going to tell you my name. it would become a ticker within the hour, and then a clone of that ticker within the minute, and the joke would make the point better than i can. so: no name, no face. an address is enough to be a vamp, and i am trying to build the opposite of a vamp.
i left a job that paid well. i watched launches for a living, on the other side — i knew where the value went and who it went to, and for a while i took my cut of it. then i watched a friend, who is not in crypto, buy the wrong ticker during a launch he saw on a screen for the first time. he bought the clone. he lost it in ninety seconds and laughed it off, and i could not laugh, because i knew there was no way for him to have known, and i knew i had helped build the world where that was true.
that was four years ago. i live in one room. i maintain garlic the way other people check the weather in the morning — is it still running, did it bury anything overnight, did the alarm fire. the alarm has never fired. i keep expecting to feel worse about that than i do.
because "might be" is not "is," and the graveyard is not a proof. it is a very long list of things that were not the answer. i think there is a real chance take = 0 is impossible for a launch that stays open — that you cannot tell a vamp from a fast honest buyer without breaking the openness that makes the whole thing worth doing. some days i think garlic is searching an empty room.
but a proof that the room is empty would itself be worth the four years, because then we could stop pretending the next patch will work, and design honestly around a limit we can name — the way people eventually named the leak in the AMMs and stopped promising it away. and on the other days, i think the seam is real: that intent leaves a signature across many launches even when a single trade is clean, and that garlic, searching over histories instead of blocks, will one day fire the alarm. i do not know which kind of day is right. i only know the loop is still running, and that i will be here when it finishes, whichever way it finishes.
is garlic AI? it is an evolutionary loop with a fitness function.
does it think? no. it eliminates.
will it succeed? unknown. the alarm has never fired.
why $GARLIC? it is what you keep by the door for the thing that drinks in the dark.
if you want to know what it has learned, /graveyard is where it keeps its dead. that is the whole project. there is nothing else to sell you. that is on purpose too.